Pangs of guilt and remorse

I'm feeling pretty guilty right now. I said I would go phonebank for No on 36 tonight and I didn't do it. Didn't go in, didn't call, just didn't. I have that luxury in that if Measure 36 passes, I won't be directly affected, although I'll certainly be affected emotionally by the wounding of so many of my friends.

So why didn't I go in and why am I contemplating bailing on canvassing Tuesday morning? Because I just don't have it in me. I thought I did but I don't. I don't like going door to door, even if it is just to remind people to vote. I don't like calling people, at home around dinner time, even if it is for something I strongly support. Something about the entire practice feels intrusive.

It's the same reason I could never be a commissioned salesperson. I feel so strongly that people need to come to their understandings in their own time and by their own path that I don't like to step in unless I'm invited. Yes, I realize that this is probably one of the more important elections in US history (local and national) and, yes, I realize that the grassroots voter mobilization effort has been one of the most significant events in recent US political history.

All that said, I still can't bring myself to feel comfortable with invading people's homes and lives.