What's the point?

I haven't been posting much lately because life has just seemed not worth talking about. I moved out here for grad school and now I'm questioning whether or not that was the best decision. I missed my loved ones a great deal over the holidays and I wonder whether my quality of life has improved since I got out here.

Lately, I feel like I'm working on an MS in Disaster and a certificate in World Sorrow. The more I learn about suffering, oppression, misery, and sorrow, the more there is to learn. There seems to be nothing positive going on - no classes about positive growth, humanity's evolution towards something good, successful examples, or anything else that's happy. There seems to be almost no information to help offset knowledge of all the world's woes and I'm feeling so depressed.

I don't love my education anymore because I don't have any hope that I can make any sort of difference. Yeah - I know all those bullshitty, trite phrases about "everyone makes a difference" and "you never know what difference you make" and all that. In the long run, however, who the fuck cares? No one. Either we all end up dead - in which case it doesn't matter - or earth is a big classroom where we all come to learn and everything is as it should be for our learning - in which case it doesn't matter either.

So why bother? Why not go find a nice guy who makes good money and just shop for pretty clothes all the time? Why even care about all these miserable things my education is pointing out to me? What a joyless, despair-filled person I feel I've become. It seems I find little happiness in my life anymore and I just want to give up trying. I'm still in school but am I really interested in learning about more shitty situations? Apparently, because I'm going to classes.

How did I get to this place? This sucks.